12 Safe sex rules no one ever taught you

Everyone knows to use a condom and get tested, but sometimes it can get more complicated than that. Below are rules clients weren't taught or completely forget during a booking.


Before sex

1. Don't brush your teeth right before sex! 

It can make small cuts in your mouth or make your gums bleed. Use mouthwash instead. To use mouthwash properly, make sure you swish it in your mouth for 30 seconds. Don't rinse your mouth with water afterwards. Mouthwash continues to work after you've spat it out, so by rinsing with water you dilute the cleaning and strengthening benefits. 

2. No sex if you have shaving cuts or sores around your groin.

A female is protected from her partner's bodily fluids by using condoms (she shouldn't have sex with cuts either). However, her bodily fluids not only go on the outside of the condom, it also goes around her partner's pubic area. It's extra important for men that they don't cut themselves shaving as it will almost certainly go into contact with her bodily fluids! This is why I recommend trimming. 


During foreplay

3. No sex with the lights off.

You need adequate lighting to see if there are any signs of STIs on your partner and that the condom is still on . If you or your partner are particularly self conscious, move your lamp from the bedside table to the floor. It will instantly turn harsh bright lighting into sexy mood lighting. Giving slow and sensual lower body kisses during foreplay helps you see up close what's going on without letting your partner know you're inspecting them. Make sure to know the difference between skin tags, moles and warts.

4. Skip the oil massage before sex.

"As little as sixty seconds' exposure of commercial latex condoms to mineral oil... caused approximately 90% decrease in the strength of the condoms" (source). Even if you avoid the groin area with oil, it's still on your hands. What do you use to put a condom on? Your hands. However, if this is an important part of foreplay for you, use water dispersible oil and keep a damp towel or a water basin next to your bed to wash it off. Avoid the groin/inner thigh area at all times.

5. Watch what your hands are doing before putting the condom on.

If you finger your partner and then play with yourself (and vice versa), you're not using condoms for STI protection anymore! If you watch an escort carefully, she uses one hand for her client and one hand for herself. Typically, the dominant hand is for the client and the other is for herself so when she goes to put a condom on, there is less fumbling around. If you're seeing an escort, follow the same rule! If a client tries to touch himself without a condom on, I coyly tell him, "that's my job" and block his hand. What I'm really doing is making sure his hands are clean so during sex, he is free to touch me or the outside of the condom as much as he wants. I can't let a client play with himself and then play with me or touch my face.

6. Don't ask for hand jobs without a condom before sex.

Using lube all over and then putting a condom on over it will increase the chances it will slide off during sex. 



7. Put on a condom on ASAP!

This prevents precum from getting everywhere. If I get precum on my hand, I can't use that hand for the rest of the booking and I have to be mindful of where I'm putting my hand at all times. I can't touch my eyes, mouth, myself or the outside of the condom (one handed hand jobs only). 

8. If you put the condom on the wrong way, don't flip it over and reuse it. Throw it away!

Check which way the condom rolls down before you put it on by holding onto the edges and pushing your thumbs through. If you flip it over and reuse it, it can transfer STIs.

9. Be able to see the condom on at all times or touch it.

Every escort periodically checks throughout a booking to make sure the condom is still on. We do this discreetly so clients don't notice and feel uncomfortable. Make sure you look down every so often to ensure the condom is still securely on. Sometimes if I don’t want to break eye contact, I will play with myself and softly touch the rubber ring of the condom so I know it's still there. 


After Sex

10. When you pull out, make sure to hold the base of the condom! 

When you cum, your penis will start to shrink, loosening the condom and making it easy to slide off as you pull out. Additionally, cum will lubricate the inside of the condom increasing the chances that it will slide off. 

11. Pull out before you go soft!

Ignore the urge to stay inside until you go completely soft - even if you hold the base. When you pull out, you may take the condom with you but everything will spill out. Yikes!

12. If you’re going for a second round, have a quick shower in between to wash cum off.

Sometimes when a condom is removed, cum spills out onto the pubic area which is what her skin and lips will be in contact with for the second round! Showering in between makes sex safer for your partner. Simply wiping yourself with tissues is not enough. If anything, you a wiping yourself dry, not clean.

Take what you've learned here into a booking or when you're with a new partner. You'll earn major brownie points for being knowledgable about safe sex and showing her you care about her health and yours.

- Valentina